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I AM THE IMMODEST GIRL

I wore this today because I’m insecure.

I looked in the mirror and the mirror told me lies. But I believe them, because they’re all I’ve ever known:

You’re not enough. You’re not attractive. You’re unloveable.

I wore this today because I want attention.

I looked in a magazine and the magazine lied. But I believe it, because it says I can be confident:

Show off your body. Make them look. Make them jealous.

I wore this today because it’s my identity.

I looked to the world and the world… it lied. But I believe it, because it accepts me:

Be you. Follow your dreams. Wear whatever you want.

I wore this today because I wanted to.

My faith is a faith of regulation. I’m tired of it. So I looked to my heart and my heart, it lied.

God doesn’t love you. All He cares about is rules.

I am the immodest girl.

I am the girl on the street, in the parking lot, in the line at the store. I am the girl at church “who should know better”, the girl asked to change. I am the girl we’ve all been at one point in time. Because we have. If not in dress, then in heart; if not in appearance, then in mind.

I am the girl who stands in her too-short dress and I have reasons I’m wearing it. Maybe I am insecure, maybe I want attention, maybe I’ve let my sexuality become my identity. Maybe I am more concerned with being viewed than being known – more consumed with being admired than being loved.

But maybe I don’t know anything else.

You are the church; you know the truth. You know that immodesty is a heart decision, but have you reached for my heart? You know that immodesty begins inside of me – but have you tried to see my soul? Hearts aren’t changed by condescension. But they can be changed by love.

Read More at phyliciadelta.com.

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